Finding Joy in Parenting

As the parent of a 1-year-old, I find myself constantly saying no.

“No! Don’t grab that.”

“No! That’s not a toy!”

So what do I hear my son repeat this morning? “No, no, no” (although, it sounded more like “na na na”)

Now, in the rush of the morning, I may not have even noticed him adding this new word to his vocabulary, but because I did, I now have a memory of experiencing that joy in the middle of setting limits. I mean, we can probably all agree that first words are adorable and welcome surprises. Being a parent keeps us busy, but mindfulness and staying present can help us notice the moments that make it worth it!

Note: As a Certified PC-Care provider, I should tell you that “no” should be reserved for situations that pose a safety risk. As a parent, I know how hard that is!

Becoming a parent is a life-altering experience, filled with both joy and challenges.

Joy is that momentary feeling of happiness that can be experienced during moments of connection, love, and contentment. It can be found in the small milestones of a child's development, the warmth of cuddling together, or the sound of their laughter.

Postpartum depression and anxiety are two common challenges that parents face after the birth of a child. These conditions can significantly impact a parent's ability to experience joy and hinder the bonding process with their child. In this blog post, we will explore the importance of reconnecting with joy as a parent, even in the face of postpartum depression and anxiety, and how cultivating gratitude can help in fostering a healthier relationship with joy.

As the responsibilities of parenthood increase, the time and energy available to experience joy may diminish. The demands of caring for a newborn, along with sleepless nights and the pressures of parenting, can lead to feelings of exhaustion, stress, and even postpartum depression and anxiety.

Postpartum depression and anxiety are not uncommon

It is crucial for parents to acknowledge and seek help if they are experiencing symptoms. These conditions can manifest in feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and a lack of interest or pleasure in activities that once brought joy.

As a Narrative therapist, I encourage parents to view their emotions as relationships that require nurturing. Just as we invest time and effort into our relationships with loved ones, we must also prioritize our relationship with joy. This means acknowledging and addressing the fears that can stand in the way of experiencing joy fully.

Fear, as a powerful emotion, can often interfere with our relationship with joy. It may cause us to worry that joy will be fleeting, that it won't last, or that external factors have control over when and how joy can enter our lives. Acknowledging these fears and challenging them can help create a more positive and open space for joy to thrive.

When postpartum depression and anxiety come into play, it becomes even more challenging to nurture a relationship with joy. These conditions can consume a parent's thoughts, leaving little room for positive emotions. To cultivate a stronger connection with joy, it is essential to actively address and seek support for postpartum depression and anxiety.

One powerful tool in rebuilding the relationship with joy is practicing gratitude.

Brene Brown, a renowned researcher and storyteller, highlights the connection between gratitude and joy. Her research suggests that gratitude and joy often coexist and that nurturing gratitude can lead to an improved relationship with joy.

Practicing gratitude involves being mindful of the positive aspects of life and actively appreciating them. It can be as simple as taking a moment each day to reflect on what you are grateful for or keeping a gratitude journal. By focusing on the good and positive aspects of life, even amidst the challenges of parenthood, we can begin to shift our attention away from fear, depression, and anxiety, allowing more space for joy to enter our lives.

Finding joy as a parent doesn't mean ignoring or denying the challenges…

It means allowing ourselves to experience moments of happiness amidst the difficulties. Joy can be found in the small triumphs of parenting, the love exchanged with a child, and the connection formed during moments of bonding.

In conclusion, reconnecting with joy as a parent, especially in the face of postpartum depression and anxiety, is a process that requires intention and effort. By acknowledging and addressing fears that may hinder joy, seeking support for mental health challenges, and cultivating gratitude, parents can nurture a more positive relationship with joy. Remember that joy is not about the absence of difficulties but about finding moments of happiness and connection amidst the journey of parenthood.

If you are having trouble connecting and believe you may be struggling with Postpartum Depression or Anxiety, please reach out for help. If you would like to schedule a consultation with me, email me at lillybeth@therapysecure.com. I would love to help you on your parenting journey.

Click here to learn more about what therapy would look like.

Embrace joy, embrace gratitude, and embrace the beauty of parenting.